852

FROM THE DESK OF EDWARD COLLINS

President – Collins Shipping

 

Employees —

Today, the literate among you you may read in the Collinsport Star society pages that I have been seen sitting at an hygenic distance at the Collinsport Square gazebo with Kitty Soames, Lady of Hampshire.

I assure you that her husband, the Lord, is quite dead.  I speak, of course, of the Lord of Hampshire and not the Abrahamic God, about whose health inquiry is fruitless.

Mr. Branstin, please come to my office at noon.  The incident of the shorn mandrill demands immediate accounting. Prepare for such.  

Signed,

EJC

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